This man is often spoken of in the show as the ‘perfect husband’. He is the one who is portrayed as a saint for putting up with his shrill, ambition-driven wife. The poor man has to deal with a woman who is not completely satisfied raising the children she never wanted and who do not appreciate her. When the two of them married, Lynette made it very clear that her profession came first. He married her knowing this, though not before sleeping with her best friend when the two were engaged. I suppose he thought that as all women obviously want to be baby factories, his needs (the only ones he consistently cares about throughout the show) were more important than hers. He figured he would get his way. And he was right. Through begging, whining and guilt, he got his wife to bare not one, but four of his bratty children. He even got her to stay home while he worked (despite the fact that she was better at her job and on track to make more than him). During the few times he ‘let her’ work, it was only because he wanted something else (a break to stay home with their now-grown-easy-to-care-for kids or go back to college to get drunk and act like a frat boy, both of which he eventually gave up and then guilted his wife back into being a stay-at-home mom because he couldn’t handle a woman who did his job better than he did).
When those five kids were not enough for him, and he got his wife pregnant again, rather than see that she did not want more children and support her in an abortion (which is the manly thing to do at any age, but especially when a woman is older and having a baby could actually risk her health) he guilted and whined until she agreed to have the baby (not really being there for her when she miscarried one of what they found out to be twins).
Of course it is hard for Tom Scavo to be there for anyone, because he is too busy being there for himself. He also demands that everyone else in his family be there for him, his impetuous mood swings and his every foolish whim and desire. And his wife is. She supported him when he wanted to put their life savings into a pizza restaurant (not the safest investment). She quit her job to help him manage the place. He responded by berating her in front of his employees and “putting her in her place” as someone who “worked for him”. She even supported him, for the most part, when he went back to school. Rather than take his studies seriously, he used this time to meet underage boys and party throughout the night. She even had to endure his mid-life crisis (yes, spending their life-savings on a pizza joint and partying with frat boys were not the midlife crisis points in question) when he joined a band and bought an expensive convertible.
Tom Scavo is a spoiled, selfish, insecure, sexist child. He is there for his wife from time to time, and has his moments of being chivalrous. But he is a far cry from the perfect husband. He is not even a good husband, and Lynette is a saint for never telling him that he has ruined her life.
Note: I am by no means saying that a life is ruined by having children, I am saying that as he is the one who placed family above (her) work, and as she was better at her job and loved it more, he should have been a man, stepped up, and taken care of the kids himself, rather than given her another one to care for.
